Did I Mention...

I still hate (I know, we don't say hate) the science fair.

Even though our puppet/stage making skills are obviously well above average,

not really a fan of the Puppet Show either.

Though I do not have a picture, The Battle of Hastings would have to get my vote for Least Favorite School Project.  Maybe it wasn't the actual project that wasn't my favorite; maybe it was my son that wasn't my favorite.  This is how Colin tends to get things done:

Wednesday, 11:30 pm

Colin (in his really, whiny voice):  "Mom, I am not going to get to do anything at school tomorrow."

Mom:  "Why not?"

Colin:  "Because you haven't helped me make my sword and shield for The Battle of Hastings tomorrow."

Mom:  "Did I know you were suppose to make a sword and shield by tomorrow?"

Colin:  "Didn't you see that cardboard in the mudroom?"

Mom (in my frustrated, I am trying not to want to beat you voice):  "Colin, really?  How am I suppose to know what the cardboard is for if you don't tell me?"

Colin:  "Don't you read your emails?  Don't my teachers send you an email about what we are doing?"

Really, Colin.  Sometimes I have to remind myself that I love this kid.  Needless to say, Colin did have a sword and shield to take to school the next morning and did get to participate in the battle. 

I think I should write a book:  "Surviving the Irresponsible Child" or "Responsibility: It Skips a Generation" 

As an added bonus, the sword and shield needed to be personalized using symbols from our coat of arms.   Tip of the day:  Fingernail Polish (It is, also, good for painting pinewood derby cars.)









A Proud Moment

Tony Parker is my new best friend; well, at least in my books, this makes us friends.  I have long held the belief that professional athletes get paid to be heckled; it's just part of their job description.  I kind of enjoy this part of the sport.  OK, I'll admit it, I think I am funny, and so I like it a lot.  Not long ago, Tony Parker totally shafted Eva Longoria (not Evan's twin sister (inside joke)).  So, at the Jazz game the other night, early in the game before the crowd is really into it, I yelled, "EVA."  Tony, nonchalantly, flipped me off!! A subtle, wave of the bird down by his leg.  It was pretty much awesome, and encouraged me to continue being obnoxious.

Remind me again, when does basketball start being fun to watch??

There are few things in life as painful as watching city league basketball.  The offensive strategy tends to be: if you have the ball...shoot.  There is no passing, lots of traveling, and really bad reffing.  But, like many other unpleasantries, it is impossible to avoid.

The first game of the season, Colin's team was down by about 20 points; it felt more like I was watching a rugby scrum than a basketball game.  Colin (if you have forgotten, Colin has some anger issues), after being bumped, scratched, slapped, pushed, and elbowed, received his first flagrant foul and game ejection.  I immediately attributed his behavior to Brian's genetic contibution. Then, I remembered a few people with Nilsen DNA (Randy, Colton, Nickole, Kicker, etc.) that may have gotten caught up in their "competitive spirit". Man, maybe it's not his Tudor side.
I'm not sure what happened, but a couple weeks later the refs called EVERYTHING; the normally 40 minute game lasted 1 hour 15 minutes.  After that things really calmed down, and the game started to look a little more like basketball.  Each game, we were still able to catch a glimpse or two of Colin's temper, but he never let it boil over.  Colin evolved into a mad shot-clocker and a rebounding machine.  He, frequently, enjoyed disputing calls with the refs. (Colin...It's city league, not the NBA!!)  Even though I feared during each game that I might be asked to take my son and never come back, Colin started to really like basketball, and I survived another year of city league basketball.

On a side note, Colton had his coaching debut (filling in for one game) and led the team to a one point win, without beating up his brother.

I Suck at Blogging

Blogging has not been at the top of my priority list.  But my friend Melanie has motivated me to find my inner-blog. So, I am giving it another go.  We'll see how long it lasts.  Haha

Your Call Cannot Be Completed...

Wednesday morning at 5:30 a.m. I was sleeping soundly when the phone rang.  My first thought is, "Who in the freak is calling at five in the morning."  I look at the caller id which reads, security screen 043-910-1800; my next thought, "Seriously, telemarketers at five in the morning."  So I immediately think, "I am not answering this." and I let the phone ring.  The caller calls right back and I think, "What the crap, leave me alone."  I pick up the phone and hang it up.  And the phone rings AGAIN!! I answer the phone and in my most annoyed tone I say "Hello."

 A heavily accented male voice cheerfully responds "Hello, Mrs. Loftus?" 

What??  Loftus?? Definitely a telemarketer.  I reply "You have the wrong number." 

Caller "Mrs. Loftus?" 

 Me (using a tone to display my disgust),"You have the wrong number." 

 Caller (still cheerful), "Oh, Mrs. Tudor?" 

 Me again "Wrong number."
 
Then I hear a very sweet, not nearly as accented male voice say "Mom, don't hang up.  It's me Colton; I'm in the hospital."

After I picked myself up off the floor, Colton was able to explain that he had three kidney stones and they needed my permission to do surgery.  Would it be considered bad parenting if you are happy your child is in the hospital because it allows you the chance to talk to him?  Well, I was.  We talked to him before and after the procedure and he is all fixed up and back to work.

Oh, and the heavily accented male voice... Mission President Tavares!!

The Trouble With Blogging

When I first started writing a blog I thought it would be a nice way of keeping track of my life.  Blogging has had an affect I did not anticipate; I now realize how repetitve my life is.  Same people, same place, same pictures, just a new year.

Nothing Says American Hero Like "John Lennon"

It was time for the annual 5th Grade Wax Museum.  The theme is American Heroes.  I'm thinking Benjamin Franklin, Abraham Lincoln, maybe James Madison.  Colin was thinking John Lennon.  I tried to explain that he was not an American.  Colin informed me that he revolutionized American rock music, which makes him an American hero.  Can't argue with that logic.  He was awfully cute and did a great job.  (Thanks Janae, for the help with the wardrobe.)